Yesterday, I scanned through some of the blogs that I really enjoy visiting, and came across a little of a reality check. Joe Gabbard's blog has a good discussion for all of those that consider themselves to be secure in their thoughts on church environment. The question of a "safe place" is a superb example of how far we as a religious culture have drifted from the intent of Christianity. People are begging for acceptance without conflict, and they don't see that to be attainable in "church." The question is, do we soften our stance on controversial topics to appease and welcome this controversy? A better question is: are we welcoming the controversy, or are we welcoming hurting people? Riddle me this, huh!

I think that religion has changed the environment that I live in greatly over the last several years. Religion and denomination have been polarized to the point that they are in focus more than the base reason for the religion. Comparatively, lack of religion or denomination seems to be more a personal badge of separation from the mainstream than a transitory search for belonging. To put is concisely, we focus more on why, where, when, and how than who. The affective results of this kind of societal philosophy is that it breaks down time-honored traditions and shakes the foundation of the faith that is being attacked. The good thing that should come out of this is the same - we consider the why, where, when, and how to make sure that it lines up with the intent of the deity we believe in (the who).

My church is a church in a transition of sorts. We have to consider the time-honored traditions because they are part of the legacy that is available for the younger generation. At the same time, we have to guide those that do not see the need for legacy yet and just want to be cared for. We also have to be open and willing to welcome a generation that has been hurt by their available legacy, and are searching for truth. In my heart, the last group is the one that I am drawn to tears over the quickest.

There is a generation of people that are tired of their youth, because it was not at all desirable. They may have been abused, lied to, taken advantage of, or a combination of all three. My childhood was full of support and loving care with the right amount of loving discipline, but that simply has not been the standard for some time now. I have to look at the world through different eyes, and I cannot do that under my own power. I cannot fully understand the person that was sexually abused as a child, and is now a mixed up, confused, defensive mess because of that abuse. I cannot completely understand the person that grew up as an object of controversy as parents fought over (or even more terrible - didn't fight over) as they went through destructive divorces. I can't understand lives that were destroyed by alcoholic or drug-abusing influences either, but that doesn't mean that I can't figure out how to love them. I see that not all people are looking for someone to take pity on them and apologize to them for their situation. Most of the time, compassion and true, considerate, loving friendship will go much farther than "yeah, I know exactly what you're going through."

Most of the "fresh adults" that I know are looking for something that will not jack up their world. They don't want anyone to throw things into turmoil, and don't want to be involved in any extra drama than they already have. They don't necessarily want to take on extra responsibilities, or feel obligated to anything that stretches them. With this in consideration, what kind of environment can I create where someone doesn't feel obligated, but can still be helped to grow in the right direction? I don't have to meet or have structured anything, I just need to show people love, and let the love do the work of creating the environment. The best friendships that I have are those where I feel instant connection - like syncing my i-pod - I don't have to go over details of every second since our last meeting. My question for you is: are you living in that kind of environment? If not, why?