I have started a project that involves the improvement of my soul. I am taking an inventory of my life, and I intend to start investing in the things that help to improve and stabilize my relationship with God. The flip-side of this is the disposal of things that aren't so important.

One of the things that I started to move toward the trash can has shown itself different in a new light. I have seen my job as one of the major things that did nothing for my soul. It provided a living for my family, but it caused heartache, heartburn, and disgust. I often find myself taking on projects that force me to neglect parts of my life that are far more important, and this usually happens despite my greatest attempts to stifle this tendency. I then feel taken advantage of, and I seldom realize that I was the one that set the wheel in motion.

I realized a few weeks ago that it is my choice to honor God in everything I do. This isn't exclusive to just worship services on Sunday mornings at LFA. It has to be a choice that I make each and every day. It has to be a decision that stays fresh on my mind throughout the day, and I am the one that gives into anything that causes me to deviate from that path. In this sense, I have experienced a feeling of freedom lately that has refreshed my mind. I choose to keep God first, and He makes it easy to do so.

My job is in inventory. I track parts that are used and manage inventory investment dollars. A large drive behind this is to make sure that we stock what we need, and we get rid of what we don't need. When I look at this from a spiritual standpoint, I start to realize that God has been preparing me for management of my spiritual investment. In a few days, I will post the list that I am working on. Until then, have you thought about what you have invested yourself in?

Psalms 46:10 “Be still, and know that I am God! I will be honored by every nation. I will be honored throughout the world.”

Last night, I resumed my reading of The Purpose Driven Life and I experienced one of the most (if not the most) intense physical encounters with my God that I have ever had. For the first time since the moment of my salvation, I felt truly, absolutely saved. I honestly needed it, and God renewed his covenant of love with me in that moment.

When I picked the book up, it was a victory for my soul that resulted from a battle with my flesh. I intended to tune in to the latest edition of sports news, or peruse the airways for anything that would catch my eye. I had just put the kids to bed, and the house was quiet for the first time of the evening. I wanted some time to just be quiet and absorb something until time arrived for sleep. Instead of picking up the remote, I gathered my book and the daily devotional that goes with it, and settled into my chair. As I began to read, my mind was absolutely flooded with junk from the day. Thoughts of work, solutions to problems, concerns with the economy, concerns for friends that are affected by the economy, and many other things were jockeying for position as my mind raced. I honestly couldn't tell you what any of the first page said, and I really wanted to get something out of my reading. I put down the book and said a quick prayer.

I prayed that God would calm the waters of my mind. I prayed that he would lay siege to the battles that were going on in my thoughts, and that He would rid my mind of the concerns and worry that were weighing me down. I wanted to be able to focus, and I couldn't with the chaos that was in progress. It was a quick prayer, but it worked immediately. It may seem ridiculous, but I am a visual person. I try to imagine things when I think about them, and it has worked well for me in the industry that I work in. I work out the solutions in my mind, and then try to convey what I have seen from behind the scenes. I do the same thing when I pray prayers like this.

I visualized choppy seas and a storm. I saw the water as it crested and crashed, and I heard the thunder as it roared across the face of the ocean. I could hear the explosions of the waves as they crashed against each other, and I could see the rain as it assaulted everything that was present. All at once, I felt lonely and vulnerable. I have never been through a storm at sea, but I imagine that it could be pretty intimidating. With no trees or other sound barriers, I imagine that the noise would be absolutely overwhelming, and the thought of it sends me into a panic. As I prayed, the picture in my minds' eye was an ocean that was suddenly and absolutely quiet. The winds and the waves stopped, and the surface of the water turned as smooth as glass. I could almost feel a slight breeze across my face, and I could hear the intense sound of peace. The clouds rolled back, and my soul was bathed in moonlight. I felt peace, I heard peace, and I could see peace. It was at that moment that I heard a slight whisper..."Be still, and know that I am God."

Goosebumps ran down my spine, and my soul started to tingle. In that moment, I realized that I was in the presence of the most powerful, most high God. Regal grace and compassion consumed me, and I felt like a lost child that had been found. My God had seen me, and He was lifting me out of my mind's chaos. There are no words that can adequately describe the feelings that I experienced. I honestly can say that I physically felt the presence of God, and I will not ever forget that feeling.

I believe that God puts things in our heart for us, and He gives us nuggets of wisdom that we are able to tap into in moments where we can't feel Him as closely as we want to. With that said, here is one of the things that God spoke into my heart.

If you are not where you are supposed to be, then it is because something hasn't moved. You shouldn't feel dismayed or tormented over this thought, you should look inward to make sure that you are not what is supposed to be moving. If you are not the issue, then take comfort in the fact that God is preparing the next step.

Our God is the creator of the universe. Genesis 1:1-2 1In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. 2The earth was without form and void, and darkness was over the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God was hovering over the face of the waters.

Take comfort in the fact that you were put here for a reason. Find sanctuary in the thought that God created everything, and He intended for us to be the caretaker for His creations. Genesis 1:28 And God blessed them. And God said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth."

Maybe this helps you, and maybe you just feel that I am a little bit crazy for thinking that God would take the time to talk to me. For what it's worth, I am a nasty creature that has a history full of failures. The only thing that I do consistently is fail miserably, and it is also the thing that I am probably the best at.

The thing that allows me to think that God would speak to me is that He created me. He made me who I am, and He intended for me to travel the road that I have travelled. Last night, He welcomed me with open arms, and He washed me clean. He trimmed my hair and made me presentable. He restored me to the place that I was created for, and He put the elegant robes of royalty on my shoulders. He has given me the inheritance that I was created to have, and I am so truly humbled by His generosity. I guess that it holds so much weight because this is not the first time that He has done this for me. I have sought to squander my inheritance many times. I have lived life the way that I thought it should be lived, and I was wrong - every time.

I smile because the prodigal is no longer a long-lost son. I shout praises because I can feel the presence of my Heavenly Father. I have hope and peace because He has me in His arms once again.

I watched the inauguration of our 44th President yesterday morning, and I saw things play out that my children will read about in their history books one day. I only hope that the things that are written will not include the hateful and arrogant words that were said under the disguise of opposition. I hope that my children will understand the reason behind why democracy grew from a burning fire to a roaring furnace. I hope that the writers are kind to our former President. He made mistakes during his two terms, but I think that he did the best with what he had to work with.

After all, my credit card debt is not his fault. Foreclosures on homes due to shifty loans or loans that couldn't be afforded in the first place are not his fault. Terrorism is not his fault. Crumbling economic structure due to a lifestyle of over-spending and over-indulgence is not his fault. The impending failure of the American Automaker due to years of compromise in order to not anger the union is not his fault. Job losses are devastating, and they have contributed to good people paying for the mistakes of irresponsible people. I seriously doubt that the people that were scamming people out of money with shifty loans even considered the collateral damage of the working American citizen. I was let go from a company that I worked for after 9-11, and my pregnant wife had to work two jobs because I couldn't even find one. I personally have experienced the agony and hurt that goes with being un-employed, but I don't think we can place all of this blame on President Bush. People that own companies don't always do the right thing, and speculation in the stock market helps to crumble financial stability. To help the picture be clearer, I intend to help my kids understand what they read about in their history books by relating the history that I have seen play out in my lifetime.


I was born in a rural town in Northwest Mississippi, just a few hours from Memphis, Tennessee. In the first few of my 30 years, much of the history that I would learn would come from the lips of my parents and grandparents. I would be taught lessons of tolerance and intolerance from people that had seen integration and depression. History books that were written by perfect strangers would seek to re-direct the lessons that I had learned from the people that I respected the most. They may have taught lessons that shouldn't have been taught, but the lesson that was the most important is the one that I hold on to still today. It is the message that makes me proud to see that President Obama is where he is today. It is also the message that allows me to have hope for our country, despite my opinion that President Obama is probably not the right man for the job. Living in the compassion and mercy of Almighty God affords me this hope.

I didn't vote for President Obama, but I believe in what his election stands for. I am proud that today is a new day for racial equality in America. I am hopeful that people will be seen as creations of God instead of people of a particular race. I know that this won't happen overnight, but I do think it has started to happen. I myself have never been slighted because of being "white," so I can't fully understand the plight of the "black" American citizen. With this said, my lack of understanding does not blind my eyes to the tears of joy and celebration that I saw yesterday. I am happy because people that felt oppressed are happy. I am relieved because the chains that some wore around their souls were broken yesterday. Belief in the love of God teaches me that all people should be loved and appreciated - no matter the color of their skin. That makes me proud of what was accomplished yesterday.

I don't think that any man (or woman) can faithfully execute the office of...faithfully execute faithfully the office of Pres...be the President of the United States of America without divine intervention (round of applause for getting through that one.) I pray for President Obama the same way that I prayed for President Bush (43 as the newscasters refer to him) and President Clinton. Despite her faults and failures, we still live in the best country on this planet. Yesterday did not end with the murder of our current leader, and the inauguration was not shrouded in controversy. There was no militant takeover of government by an extremist section of radicals. There will be no persecution of my practice of religion come next Sunday. I will be able to meet and praise God in public, without fear of death. I can go to Wal-Mart and purchase a bible, bread, milk, and anything else that I need to sustain life. I may not be able to go the bank and get a loan for an expensive new luxury car, but there are base models to choose from - I just have to roll the window up instead of push a button.

Lately, I have been reminded of finality. Last week, one of the planes that my company owns crashed in a field in Colorado. Two people lost their lives in a tragic accident that came from nowhere. It taught me that my experience can teach me about my past, but it can't prepare me for all parts of my future. My life on this earth is at best only a sparkle in the eye of eternity, and sometimes finality comes like a lightning strike.


A very close friend of mine is smack in the middle of a true-life hard spot, and finances are putting the squeeze on his sanity. In fact, I have several friends that are in this same kind of situation. Their circumstances are different, but they all have the same rock and hard spot that hovers over them. I don't have to look very far to see my own set of ominous figures on the horizon. It's ironic that my past holds both hope and conviction, but faith in my reason for hope takes care of all conviction. Finality in this view is an unseen possibility - it could be a breath of fresh air, or a chance to start again. In either case, this finality will be the end of something while something else begins. Faith is a beautiful thing.


In my opinion, our world is in a stage of finality. Events that transpire daily point to the end of things in different world arenas. Finances seemingly stand on the precipice of failure, balancing unstable trust with a history of lies and deception. It has become a look at when and not if collapse will visit the global standard of frivolous living. The truth is that many in the world are not as fortunate as the most "successful," and a pruning of the money tree is probably what is needed.

Terrorism keeps people fearful of going out in the streets of many foreign countries. Sadly, the pictures that I see scrolling on the evening news point out that those homes that they find sanctuary in are being destroyed as well. War and conflict have been the one thing that seems to always outlast change in our world, and the conflict in Israel brings me to tears.

There are many examples of things that bring depression and dismay to our evening dinner table conversation, but only one delivers true peace and hope every time. My faith in Jesus allows me to look at my life as it relates to the timeline of infinity. Existence on this earth is but a dash mark in the long line that awaits me. Hope, peace, and love give me stability here, and cause me to look towards the heavens with anticipation of a true-life "stimulus package." Times like the present make me all the more happy that God has compassion for failures like me.


On a separate note:

As we celebrate the inauguration of a new president tomorrow, please take a moment to say a prayer for this man. His election has ushered in a healing of racial tensions that inflicted wounds many years ago. His supporters have been able to see hope in a new light, but extremists will likely see tomorrow as an opportunity. Please pray for safety for our country during this time of transition. Lets pray that people will see his election as the work of the hand of Almighty God. We celebrate a man today in Dr. King that would ask the same. He stood for dignity and equality, and he qualified that stance with his life of dedication to the cause of Christ.

Today, "Happy MLK Day" rings with truer meaning than any other time in my life.

Books are great avenues for imagination. They foster environments that are untested and uncontrollable by outside events. Imagination may be influenced by these events, but it cannot be ultimately controlled. Imagination is also the flexing of the muscles of the mind. These muscles are simple in childhood, but they morph into complex structures of goals, hopes, dreams, and possibilities during adulthood. Imagination is the life-blood of creativity and possibility.

The action that perpetuates possibilities in a novel is the turning of a page. On the current page, your hero can be faced with certain demise and impending doom. Simply turning the page can deliver him out of the clutches of evil, and propel him towards the preferred happy ending. It could also further entangle the hero in the increasingly difficult grip of defeat. The perfect thing about this is the possibility of the next page - also known as imagination.

The page turned yesterday as our pastor announced his impending resignation.

Pastor Carter is an amazing man, a great leader, a profound inspiration, a grand example of Godly character and integrity, and I could go on and on. He is a great friend, and he has shown me the true meaning of the good shepherd. I have enjoyed being able to serve him, and the void that is left from the departure of that enjoyment will be hard to fill. Pastor Carter taught me about restoration and resilience. I have been able to learn how to be a better father, husband, and man from watching him. He was not always perfect in his presentation of the gospel, but he was perfect in his intent. He has always been willing to let his agenda and thought take a back seat to the will of God - no matter what was happening during that particular moment. In this situation, he is doing exactly that. He is following the will and call of God in his life. God is speaking to him, and he is listening. He leads by example, and I think that this is his truest great quality. His leadership will definitely be missed, and that is part of his legacy.

So, we as a church are experiencing a turning of the page event. I hate to put such an over-used phrase on the impending departure of a 15-year leader of our church, but it is the best one that fits to me. The page that is being turned brings to a close a brilliantly exhilarating series of chapters in the history of the life of our church. I have only been here for 5 of those years, but I have grown tremendously in that time. The future brings both sorrow for the absence of a great friend in the pulpit, and exciting expectation of what the next chapter is going to hold. It is different to be excited and sorrowful simultaneously.

Our church is not in a bad place, and the departure of our pastor is not due to misdeeds or abuse of position. This is not a bad thing, despite the feelings of sadness that we all feel. Pastor is showing us one last time from his leadership position that we are to follow the will of God, and allow God to be the end destination of our path. Where we go from here as a church is dependent upon the imagination of the person that is turning the page. Pastor Carter's life is in that same position. Our shared privilege is to have the one that wrote the book also be the one that is turning the page.

Last night, my very good friend and music minister, Tim Gabbard, said something that is really affecting me. At first listen, I thought that it was a good point, but I am only now starting to really digest it. He hit me with "Call it what it is."

We started a 3 week devotion series on "The Heart" (see Tim's blog here) and I am really looking forward to seeing it through. With everything like this that you participate in, the presenter usually gives you their purpose behind it. Tim did that well, but I am choosing to take it a step further. I intend to do some thorough cleaning in the area of my heart. Call it a resolution, or a list of resolutions if you want, but this isn't just a thought that will die in a few weeks. This is a dedication to finding my purpose for being on this planet. I am going to find God's purpose for my life this year, and the first step is to do some spring cleaning in my heart.

The devotion is written so that the reader can find ways to help identify problems in their heart. These problems keep the reader from fully realizing the power and product of the Holy Spirit in their life. It is an interesting study, and it is well written. The scripture selections are great, and Tim did a bang up job putting it together.

"Call it what it is" has put some things in the light of day, and they aren't pretty. I tried to justify my greed for money by calling it "providing a great life for my family." I labeled pride "holding myself accountable for my own success." Envy was called by the moniker "wanting the best for me and my family." I could list others, but I prefer to do my own dirty laundry. I am discovering that I try to justify most of the really terrible sins that I have tied myself to by claiming that it is doing something for my family. I have been lying to myself, and that is stupid. If I can't tell myself the truth, what business do I have trying to tell anyone anything? I am probably scared to tell myself the truth, because it would end up making me do some things that are uncomfortable.

I haven't read a book for enjoyment in probably 15 years. I realized that all I do in the evenings is sit and stare at the TV until I can't hold my eyes open. At first, I justified it by watching sports, then it was family-friendly dramas. Now, I sit disgusted with myself with what I have been pouring into my spirit. I don't watch any terrible TV shows that would affect my kids, and I don't watch anything that promotes sexual agendas. I just watch stuff - TLC, Discovery, Science Channel, and some local stuff. I also spend hours on the internet, checking news and sports stats. The problem is that all that "stuff" is just filler - junk food for my soul. It has made my spirit unhealthy, and it has drowned out the Holy Spirit in my life. I force so many things into my spiritual stomach that it becomes bloated and out of proportion to what my life should be. I have become a spiritual glutton - and not in a good way.

This new year, I have started to change that. I am reading 2 books right now, and this devotional will make the 3rd text that will be feeding my spirit. "Purpose Driven Life," and "Covenant Marriage" are the other two books that I am reading. I picked these two because they are the two areas in my life that I want to see the greatest improvement in. They also intertwine well. I cannot hope to be the husband that I need to be if I don't know what my purpose is. I spend my time reading these books instead of watching TV, and it is starting to make a difference. I will do this for the next few months, but I won't cut out TV completely. I think that balance is the key to living the life that I am supposed to live.

I just need to learn balance by standing on the balance beam instead of by juggling chainsaws.

Wow! It has been a month since I updated my blog. Life has been hectic, but now it will hopefully get back to something that at least resembles normal.

In looking at the new year ahead, I have to take a minute to look in the rear-view for a moment. Sitting in this position in January of 2008, I was in a terrible place. I worked a job that required parts of my soul that should have belonged to my family. I made great money, and that started to jockey for position as the driving force in my life. I couldn't remember the last time that I spent good quality time with my kids, and my spiritual life was struggling to tread water. At times, I honestly wondered what this life was supposed to mean.

I did see great times of blessing, and I had great moments of worship and connection with Christ. The problem is that I didn't feed that connection well enough. Problems that resulted from the war between my selfish pride and my soul resulted in things that would tear my attention away from God.

We raised Emu's when I was young. Even the adults were extremely curious animals, and their attention span was painfully short. If they came across a shiny gum wrapper or piece of glass, they would find themselves absolutely enamored. Little things caught their attention, and it forced them to wander point to point instead of walk with determination.

Looking back at the year, I guess you could say that I was just like those birds from time to time.

I made a career change, and decided to take a job that paid less so that I could keep my family. During the months before that change, I had to have serious conversations with both my wife and myself. I had to talk about ultimatums and deadlines for change. I had to be accountable for the first time in my life, and I didn't really enjoy it all that much. It was tough, but I am glad that it was forced upon me. I am happy that I made the right decision, and I take comfort in knowing that God loves me. Relationships are important, and they take work to keep them healthy. My wife taught me that, and I love her tremendously for it. I can say that I have found the secret to a wonderful relationship - dedication. I have some serious work to do with my relationships, but that is what life is all about.

I also learned that making the right decisions does not always bring easy travel down the road of life. If things were my way, it would be more like a slip-n-slide instead of a path. The path makes you take time to learn from the journey.

We had un-expected expenses with car problems, and our house was burglarized. The kids fought sickness nearly continually, and my oldest started his first year of kindergarten. These things made 2008 a big, nasty blur. Honestly, I am glad that it is over. I look forward to a new year so that we can hopefully catch our breath.

I heard from friends that I hadn't heard from in years. I started new friendships, and I saw the end of a few as well. I shed a few tears, I fought back even more, and I hope that the laughs outnumbered them both. I came to some realizations, and I had to give in to rationalization. I learned more than I forgot, and I became a year older. All-in-all, last year was a success. It will make me smarter about this year, and it makes me look forward to what comes next.

The words of an old hymn ring in my head as I bring this post to a close. I don't know exactly what tomorrow holds, and it could bring good times or bad. The thing that makes me raise my head and plow through is the reality of Who holds that tomorrow in the palm of Their hand.

-I Know Who Holds Tomorrow -
"I don't know about tomorrow,
It may bring me poverty;
But the One Who feeds the sparrow,
Is the One Who stands by me.
And the path that be my portion,
May be through the flame or flood,
But His presence goes before me,
And I'm covered with His blood." - Ira Stanphill

Thank you for putting my "happily-ever-after" to song, Mr Stanphill. I wish I could talk to God like you could.